Force Friday and Sith Saturday

And so the merchandising begins. Tales of my weekend hunt and future tales of future hunts to come soon. But in the meantime, here's a picture of the first haul.

Movie Talks: Megamind (2010)

As many of you my Dear Reader may know, I love a good superhero movie. That is part of the reason why Dreamwork's Megamind makes it onto my list of Top 10 Favorite Movies (only one movie per franchise or Star Wars and the Dark Knight Trilogy would be the whole list). But another reason is I feel that the movie reminds me a little bit of who I actually am. Now, before I continue, this post will have to discuss a little of the basic plot, but not enough to constitute a Spoiler Alert in my book.

The movie's main character is a Supervillain who has given himself the oh so humble title of "Megamind, Incredibly Handsome Master of All Villainy", and the plot starts with his battles with the Superman-esque "Metroman, Defender of Metro City". The story of Megamind is actually quite tragic. He was sent to Earth by his parents while their planet was being destroyed, again, more Superman references. Megamind never could fit in while he was growing up and eventually decided that if he was going to be the bad guy, he was going to be the "baddest guy ever". And so the film continues, with Megamind facing an existential crisis after beating Metroman. With no hero to fight what is the point of being a villain. He says it best in the movie when contemplating a Drinking Bird Desk Toy, alway drinking, always thirsty. This leads him to create a new hero to do battle with, however with the hero becoming a villain, Megamind must become the hero.

So what about this character do I find intriguing? While watching this movie today I was faced with a quote from the villain of this movie, Titan who says something to the effect of "we live in the real world, not some fantasy". Now those who know me personally know that, at times I can take a very bleak outlook on the world and on the nature of humanity in general. Because my ideas are so different than those I am typically around and from those I grew up with I have grown up feeling like I am the villain of the story. Not that I am evil, but I am always opposed and told that I am wrong. Maybe I am. So, watching this movie, I wonder if I am the villain in my view because I am different or because I've made myself believe that. Megamind says it himself: "I'm the bad guy. I don't save the day, I don't ride off into the sunset, and I don't get the girl". Well are we all either good guys or bad guys? Am I stuck being on side of the coin of the battle between good and evil? I've realized that I'm not stuck. Superheroes are not all the same, we all don't have to be the most liked or the best looking to be a hero. We play to our strengths and chose to be the hero. So I may get out of hand sometimes. But what superhero doesn't lose control of himself at one point or another? Even Superman, for all I dislike about him being incorruptible, fell in the Injustice storyline. But it is because we fall that we are able to see how we can become better. Maybe we have to be in the dark sometimes, just so we can know what it is like to be in the light.

I may have said some crazy things in the past. I may have thought some crazy thoughts, but in the end I'm just someone wanting to be a hero, wanting to fit in. So maybe you, Dear Reader, do not fit in. I mean, you are reading a rather non-mainstream blog, how did you even find this? But I'm glad to have you read my ramblings. Remember, we don't have to be villains just because we're not liked. We can all be heroes, even superheroes.

April Fool's Day: The Aftermath

Now I enjoy a good joke as much as the next person, in fact some might even say that I love jokes, that I revel in them. Well, Dear Reader, it may come as a shock to find that this April Fool's Day was spent by me waiting out the storm. As a result of my year long tricks and jokes many people hold me in especially low credibility of April Fool's Day. As a result, my tricks never work on April Fool's Day. I would be okay with the day if it were just that, but the problems of the day are compounded with the fact that I am, ironically, very easily tricked, being the trusting person that I am.

Although I currently reside with an entire country between us, my Father still finds away to fool me on this day. As he led me on a half hour scourge of the internet, I'm sure he was laughing away back home. As a result I was on the watch for the rest of the day. Unfortunately the Hebrew Quiz was a very real thing. Returning home later in the day I elected to hold down the fort, my hall being infested with self proclaimed "Mercenary Pranksters". And these individuals are actually quite skilled. I have seen their work and been impressed. However, also as a result of their activities, our hall is frequently targeted by other halls for retaliatory actions. May we never forget the Shower Curtain Affair of Fall 2014.

So there I was, at my desk, in my room, with a packet of Economics work that has taken approximately 12 hours in total to finish. When I hear a commotion in the halls. The first major prank of the day. I see a group of these "Mercenary Pranksters" moving the bed and personal effects of one resident into the bathroom. The roommate of this resident was complicit, being the Captain of this Band. I return to my desk and work a few more hours. Before long, the next prank occurs. Peering out of my door I see that it is not in fact my door they were laughing at, I had feared attack all day, it is the door across the hall. A stack of cups, full of water have been stacked like a pyramid in front of the door, with the bottom-most cup taped to the door which would undoubtedly cause a cascade of water upon the opening of the door. Satisfied that I was still safe I returned.

The rest of the night passed without great incident. Except for my roommate revealing that he possessed four cans of silly string all was quiet on the home front. Until this morning that is of course. Exiting my room for the daily morning rituals of showering I came across an impressive sight. Barricades in the hall had been erected, barricades of newspaper creating for an interesting trek to the doors. There were also traces of silly string on the ground as if some great battle had ensued the night before. I guess I will never know the truth of what occurred that night after I had retired to my bed, and, to be honest, I do not believe I want to know.

36 Hours

36 Hours.
Just 36 hours more before I defy gravity.
36 hours more before I begin my journey home.

Just 36 more hours. I can hold on. I'm going home.

100 Rules for College: As Written by a BYU Freshman

With the semester almost gone, and with Finals upon us, I feel like writing down 100 rules for college life based on my experience so far. They are as follows, and are written down in the order they came into my head:

1. Hot Pockets are not your friends.
2. Cannon Center Omelettes are not your friends either.
3. I wouldn't trust the Lean Cuisines from the vending machines either...
4. Always check your weekend plans before agreeing to a date.
5. Be sure you have a friend who could be a second choice for the girl if you fail to comply with Rule 4.
6. Never bet college students food, you will lose.
7. Always check your evening plans before heading out on the town, or else you will be late for work.
8. Do not use chopsticks as Walrus Tusks.
9. Classes at 9 am are early
10. Classes at 8 am are even earlier.
11. If you do not strap your keys to your pants you will lose them.
12. Check everyone's major before you make a joke about Art History majors, there are more of them than you expect.
13. Get to know the library computers. In the case that your laptop kills itself then you will need to beg for mercy at the feet of the library computers.
14. Karaoke Night is always an option.
15. Do not let Netflix steal sleep, you will regret it in the morning.
16. Bring your Student ID EVERYWHERE, no exceptions.
17. It is okay to assume a false identity, so long as you never intend to see that person again.
18. Guard your floor's shower curtains with your life.
19. All noises outside your door after 10 pm must be inspected.
20. Leave neither your keys nor your wallet in your friend's car. For reason refer to Rule 21.
21. Everybody talks. 
22. If your friend learns the unlock pattern to their phone, be sure you learn theirs.
23. Do not under any circumstances attempt to push your friends into a hot tub. Bad idea. He will take you down with him.
24. If you take Accounting and Finance concurrently, be prepared for overlap.
25. It is most of the times, okay to be impish.
26. Be scarce when cleaning checks come around
27. Never reveal where the good WiFi is in the building.
28. If your friend who is female (specifically NOT a girlfriend) starts talking to your friends back home, they will like her more than you.
29. Never ask your profesor if they are purposefully dressed like a pirate.
30. Lock up your food.
31. Develop a simple, non-verbal code with your roommate to communicate simple messages secretly.
32. Make friends with someone who has a car.
33. Keep your journal far away from anyone else.
34. If you are in a Long Distance Relationship never lose hope or faith. The distance will make the reunion that much better.
35. Keep all containers.
36. Invest in good air fresheners.
37. Legal pads are superior writing pads.
38. Always have a good hiding spot in your room you can quickly get into.
39. If possible, sleep away from the door and near the window. This puts optimal distance (and your roommate) between yourself and any potential axe murderers. Additionally it places you near a convenient escape route.
40. Within your room establish territory and zones of neutrality. This is important in establishing dorm room hierarchical social structures.
41. Always look presentable when exiting your room. Through this means attempt to discover the social structure of the floor and ensure you do not find yourself low on the pecking order. 
42. Never leave your clothes unattended in the laundry room. They will be stolen and you will be sad.
43. Establish a good relationship with  your roommate, you'll need each others' backs.
44. Man does not live by Pop-Tarts and Ramen alone.
45. Nevertheless, Pop-Tarts and Ramen provide a sufficient food source for late night studying.
46. Determine what items and foodstuffs are held in common for your room.
47. Apparently watching Netflix in the lobby causes Copyright Law issues. I wouldn't know from experience, a friend told me once.
48. Be sure to get out of the room occasionally. 
49. Watch the clock, it runs faster than college students at the mention of free food.
50. If you spend all your time looking in the mirror you'll go mad. Be someone else's mirror and help them see their good traits.
51. Admire yourself in the mirror from time to time nevertheless.
52. Never under any circumstances sound like Jaden Smith in word, text, or Morse.
53. Shave often.
54. Have a regular weekly activity to distract yourself with.
55. After doing your laundry, ensure your roommate does his.
56. Don't talk about Fight Club.
57. If you are the Potato Fiend, do not get caught. 
58. If you are not the Potato Fiend you must protect the Potato Fiend.
59. When asked who is the Potato Fiend, all present must defend him like he is Spartacus, by standing and saying "I am the Potato Fiend".
60. Many may act, but there is only one original.
61. Never lose hope.
62. Keep in touch with those you love, make sure they know you love them.
63. All Hail the Glow Cloud. All Hail.
64. Puppies solve many problems.
65. Corgis heal most wounds. 
66. Never leave home without your iClicker.
67. Do not mix up Debits and Credits.
68. Find a source of income that is both legal and steady.
69. Get a good pen and guard it with your life.
70. Never let an idea go, so you can make beautiful things like this list.
71. There is no shame in getting lost in a maze of recycling blocks. 
72. There is also no shame in getting scared out of your mind in said maze.
73. Establish a common meeting spot.
74. Always have a back-up. 
75. Learn to identify crossdressing Hebrew Nouns.
76. If you are able to, anything said in semaphore is acceptable.
77. Leave early when playing Humans vs. Zombies.
78. Pack all you'll need for the day when playing Humans vs. Zombies.
79. Watch Odd Thomas.
80. Your laptop is your most valuable tool, protect it. 
81. Arrange proper viewing schedules for your television shows.
82. Do not forget why you are at college.
83. When in character, stay in character.
84. If you sing poorly at karaoke, do not worry, it's just karaoke.
85. Attend Karaoke night at your own risk, many believe they can rap. They cannot.
86. Karaoke Duets are always more fun.
87. Should you attend a Murder Mystery, review the laws concerning your profession so as to not accidentally admit to committing a white collar crime.
88. Be graceful in all you do.
89. Do not listen to sad music when you are feeling sad. I recommend instead Awesome Mix Vol. 1.
90. Always think before referencing pop culture.
91. Do not do laundry on the weekends, the machines will always be occupied.
92. Always check your pockets before doing laundry, you will lose your earbuds.
93. Do not let your fears get the best of you.
94. Never offend, neither purposefully nor accidentally.
95. Always look around.
96. Check your mail everyday. This will ensure you never get anything but junk mail. But the moment you stop checking your mail is when you will get a bill in the mail.
97. Network with other students.
98. Ignore Rule 17. It's just a bad idea.
99. You will say "Finals are upon us" before you realize it.
100. When jumping is the only option you have, you jump and try to make it work.

The Thumbtack

There is a thumbtack stuck to the ceiling,
It is green.
This room is very quiet,
The Jealous Hypocrite shoots me disapproving glances from across the table.
Our neighbors speak of random oddities in muffled voices from behind the wall.
I am bored tonight, with no actual work left for me.
There is a thumbtack stuck to the ceiling.
It is green.
And it is fascinating.

Black Clad Sharks

They give and they take. They lurk between the islands so neatly distributed in their sea. They give from the left, they take from the right. They are black-clad sharks. They smile with white, gleaming teeth. They are so kind. However there are somethings you'll never find. The fact that they have a secret wish: to no longer swim the sea between the islands. They are the black clad sharks with pearly white smiles. They live to serve, and even though they are sharks, they do not eat. They only take your empty plates.